TOGETHER BUT NOT TOGETHER
Written by Olabisi David
written for REGEN
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Don’t be confused, I’m here to convince and not to confuse you that you can be together but not together.
About two years ago, King D and I decided to have a staycation. We both had some days of work leave so we took it at the same time and decided to Netflix and chill at home
First thing was to graciously take Deedee to spend some time with family. And viola, it was just Us!
As hours went by flowing into days, I noticed something. We were both together, relaxing and all but we weren’t connecting as much as I would have loved us to. I wondered what was wrong. It wasn’t bottled up emotions neither was it any disagreement hanging in the air.
It was our mobile devices!!!!
As useful as they can be, they have the capacity to make lovebirds drift apart.
You can practically sit next to each other and not even connect one bit. Everyone may be trying to catch up on unending happenings on social media.
When you are done surfing through Facebook, you move to IG and you keep scrolling through the unending posts, and slowly time is slipping through. You sleep off while at it and resume the next morning.
This is an unhealthy cycle for your marriage.
I do not mean you should stay away from social media, I’m only saying in the midst of it all set aside a time for true connection with your spouse.
Some of us even press our phones at the dinner table.
We go on dates to restaurants or cinemas and spend the whole time pressing our phones.
We have nothing to discuss with our spouse and gradually, we are losing touch with one another.
Sit with your spouse, ask if they are genuinely happy. Talk about your dreams and aspirations. Share your childhood memories with each other. Listen to each other attentively
If we are not intentional about these moments, we may wake up one morning to realize we are now sleeping next to a complete stranger, whom we do not know at all! Stay connected!