My heart pounded furiously as i tried to say something, I opened my mouth but no word came out. I swallowed hard and looked away, deeply embarrassed and confused.
βMaryβ Samuel called my name softly, breaking my heart and flogging my soul with his voice. He really behaved like a good christian, very forgiving and caring, making my conscience flog and bite me without mercy.
The way he offered his help totally broke me into two, i really couldnβt believe he was ready to help after how i betrayed and dumped him the previous year.
βI donβt deserve your help, sympathy or anything, please just go, i beg of youβ I finally managed to mutter, shaking and surprising him with my outburst.
βYou are too proud and it isnβt good for a girlβ he said with a very sad face. I breathed deeply and touched his left cheek,
βYou are a very nice guy who deserves something better. Seriously each time i look at you, my conscience hurts because i instantly remember all the bad things i did to you, so accepting anything from you will kill me, please just let me be, moreover iβm not in any terrible situation that needs help, believe meβ I explained calmly. He bit his lips and stood up.
βI broke my pride and most importantly i did what every guy will frown upon, by coming back to see you, but itβs okayβ he murmured regretably.
βOh no Samuel donβt say thatβ I cried, stood up and hugged him tightly, βyou are a very nice guy and i know God will repay you somehowβ I prayed,
βWe donβt choose who we fall in love with, itβs something that happens without influence, and when it happens we leave everything just to follow our heart. Sometimes we end up with the wrong person, but believe me thatβs itβ I poured out as i held him tightly,
βAnd what happens to a guy who falls in love with a girl who happens to love another?β he asked,
βSeriously i canβt answer thatβ i murmured with a heavy heart.
βI wronged you, i scammed your family and broke their trust. Iβll be at your family house next saturday to apologize and seek forgiveness from your familyβ i heard myself say. He instantly broke away from me, stared into my eyes and rubbed his face with his palms.
βWill you actually do that?β he asked curiously,
βOf course i will, moreover itβs the only way i can atone for my sins and be free from the evil touch of misfortune which has befallen me latelyβ i confessed.
Was there ever anything seen like love and sorrow meeting together in a place?.
The pure love of Samuelβs noble heart, and the keen sorrow in mine, brought sadness more bitter than death upon us as we stared at each other that fateful Sunday.
βAlright then, i have to get goingβ Samuel muttered seriously. I nodded with a faint smile,
βThanks again for checking up on me, hope you will be at home on Saturday?β i asked meekly,
βOf course i willβ he replied, breathed deeply and turned to leave.
βSam please waitβ i begged nervously, forcing him to stop, turn and stare at me curiously,
βI have cute course-mates who will be willing to have a relationship with a guy like you, should i arrange one for you?β i asked nervously. He breathed deeply and shook his head,
βNever mind, thanksβ he objected,
βAre you sure?β i asked seriously,
βYea and iβm also very sure you will later regret leaving the only boy that truly loved youβ he answered, turned and left without another word.
______
I took a long shower, freshened up and had a little nap. However a loud knock on my door hours later, woke me up. I lazily answered my door and smiled brightly as my eyes fell on Mariam.
βThank God you are back, i missed you dearβ i happily cried as we hugged each other.
βMe tooβ she murmured happily.
Even though our friendship wasnβt as strong as it used to be due to my strange affair with Emmanuel, we still maintained a little closeness and still shared a unique bond which kept us together like sisters. She never supported how i got back with Emmanuel, but it never stopped me from sharing my fears with her.
βCould you believe Emmanuel has a daughterβ i announced as she walked into my room,
βDonβt say that, jeez!β she exclaimed with surprise, settled down on my bed with both hands on her jaw and listened keenly. I calmly sat beside her and narrated the latest story of my life to her.
βDamn this is so weird and unbelievableβ she murmured and shook her head after listening to all i poured out,
βMy dear i think you should run away from that guy, unless you are willing to risk your life over him. Moreover it isnβt too late for you, since you havnβt given him much commitment, nor slept with him after that careless night you spend at his family house last yearβ she advised seriously.
βYou are right, but i just canβt do it, donβt ask me why pleaseβ i said seriously. She scoffed, shook her head and held my left shoulder,
βI think you are being insanely stupid, seriouslyβ she scolded,
βyou used to be a level headed, intelligent girl, but it seems like you are getting stupid as you grow older, please donβt take it the wrong way, but i have to tell you the truthβ she added with a serious look.
βWhat is love without happiness?, and what is happiness without a bright future?β she asked, forcing me to look away in confusion,
βThere is no doubt you are love with Emmanuel, but where is your happiness, and how will your life turn out in few years coming?β βThis is no soap opera, we are talking about your life. Youthful love fades with time, but happiness and bright future can make it last a life timeβ She advised with burning eyes,
βYou are like my sister my dear, and i know you have a very good but weak heart, do you think you stand a chance with Stella and her numerous antics eeh?, answer me?, moreover how are you sure Emmanuel wonβt abandon you at the last moment, because heβs good at it?β she asked seriously. I silently swallowed hard, lost in thought.
I was lost, disoriented and disorganised. Instead of helping, Mariam choosed to dismember me with her frightening questions. But sometimes a truthful reality is very painful and horrible to imagine.
But could she be right with all sheβs just said?
To be Continued-
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