It’s interesting to see and understand the uniqueness and peculiarity of the five love languages according to Dr Gary Chapman; Words of Affirmation, Physical touch, Quality time, Gifts , Acts of service.
If you don’t know this, pls grab a copy of the book. It’s a start to understanding your love needs and that of your partner.
I recently realized that there is an unwritten love language that touches the core of the souls of many, if not all. This is “Inclusion”.
Do you know there is a difference between informing and including?
When you have processed all you want to do, taken a decision and perhaps started to implement and then you let your partner know what you are doing, that is an information.
When there is a thought going through your mind and you share with your spouse, seek their input and then you both agree on a decision, then that is Inclusion.
Many people operate on the level of information. This doesn’t capture the full essence of having a partner to do life with. “It’s not good for man to be alone” isn’t just for warming the bed.
Checking on your spouse while you go about your daily activities is also inclusion. It’s absurd that you spend 8 hours at work and can’t even step aside for 2 minutes to say hello. Trust me, you are not that busy!
Ensuring that your ‘extended’ family treats your spouse as one of them rather than an outsider, that’s inclusion!
Letting your partner in on occurrences around you, your dreams and aspirations, new friends made, bucket list and so on – that’s inclusion!
Inclusion speaks respect and honour. It shows how much you value your spouse and their contributions to your growth and well-being. It shows that you consider them a partner and not someone beneath you.
P.S: There is a flip side of this and I’ll write on that next.
P.S 2: Letting your spouse in on a surprise you are planning for them – that’s NOT inclusion 
, I don’t even know what to call that. King D is on this table
Written by Olabisi David
Presented by Damilare Mike David
written for REGEN
